Thinking back over life always makes me wonder how time passed so quickly. Sometimes I think back to things that may have happened when I was a child and I smile at the fond memories. There are some of those memories that are so clear and crisp, I could swear they only happened yesterday or a moment ago. Other times I might be chatting with friends, reminiscing over our pasts and again some of the memories are very vivid.
People will always tell you how time flies and to appreciate the things that you have in the here and now. I never listened to that when I was younger. Perhaps no one really does when they're young because first you think you'll never grow old, and second you think you already know everything.
It has only been within the past few years that I truly appreciate all the advice (okay, maybe not ALL) that I have received over my lifetime. That could have something to do with the fact that I'm nearly 30, or it could be that I have 3 children of my own and I am watching them grow up so quickly.
Of course there are the hard times when you wonder if you're ever going to survive because the task of raising children seems so daunting. But then there are the other times... those wonderful times when your child crawls into your arms and tells you how much they love you. Or when your baby is crying and all it takes is sitting and rocking them while singing a lullaby.
Sadly, my lullaby days will be coming to an end sooner than I would hope. My youngest is a toddler who is finally learning the joys of independence. My oldest is in school and comes home everyday with new tales from her friends. I guess it will always seem that time will either move too quickly or much too slowly. Or as a human we're never completely content with our surroundings. Who really knows?
Anyway, what I really wanted to say with all of this is to just enjoy the time you have. Because one day soon, you're going to open your eyes and see grown children standing in front of you. Children that no longer want to sit in your lap or curl up next to you on the bed while you read them a book. They'll no longer come running to you every time they fall down. Kisses will no longer heal everything that's wrong. So why not enjoy what you have? Because sooner or later it's gonna pass you by.
So I got to thinking the other day about love. What exactly is love? And what does it mean? It's a widely used term, but I think when it comes down to it, no one really uses it in the correct context anymore. It's used casually, like an offhand comment. It's sad in a way to think that such a strong and powerful word holds nearly no meaning anymore.
Let's look at the dictionary definition of love. (Thanks to www.dictionary.com for any of my dictionary needs.) I'm going to only use the first 5 because otherwise I'll be typing all day.
love:
| 1. | a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. |
| 2. | a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. |
| 3. | sexual passion or desire. |
| 4. | a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart. |
| 5. | (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love? |
Seems fairly straightforward, but there are so many underlying things that are often overlooked when talking about love. Like forgiveness. Can you truly love someone if you hold animosity toward them in your heart? If you aren't able to truly forgive them for wronging you, is the love you have true? Because it certainly isn't pure. Which brings about another interesting point. Pure love. Does it exist? Other than in a theological way, I'm not sure. If you're a religious person, mainly a Christian, you are taught about an agape kind of love. Another definition for you...
agape:
| 1. | the love of God or Christ for humankind. |
| 2. | the love of Christians for other persons, corresponding to the love of God for humankind. |
| 3. | unselfish love of one person for another without sexual implications; brotherly love. |
The first one I can see existing. The others, not so much. Is there anyone in today's society that is truly unselfish? It goes back to the whole forgiveness aspect of love. Unselfish people have no problem with forgiveness. Or I should say, they have no problem with the second and most important part of forgiveness, which is letting go. Most people will tell you they forgive you, but there is always a small seed of doubt in the far recesses of their mind that will linger, sometimes forever.
Is it really possible for people in a society like today's to have an all-encompassing, never waning, fully forgiving kind of love? I'd like to think yes. Or at least I'd like to think that some people are given the opportunity to start with a clean slate. To start over from where a relationship went sour. Wouldn't that be great?
In the bible it teaches of love, or what love should be. Here is the passage:
1 Corinthians 13
The Way of Love
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.
So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.That is the love I wish everyone had. The kind of love that forgives all, knows all, sees all yet loves anyway. The kind that will pick you up when you fall. Will help you when you need it most. Will look past your errors, see the true you that lies beneath, and will love you despite it. Because none of us are perfect. None of us are sin free. None of us hold the answers to the universe. But maybe, just maybe we can find that one person that makes us a better person.
So today my mom and I took the girls to the Aronoff in Downtown Cincinnati to see the Cincinnati Ballet's production of Peter Pan. First I would like to say that I am a huge PP fan. I loved the Disney movie, Hook, and Peter Pan the movie, which was released by Universal Pictures and probably any other form of it I can get my hands on. But who wouldn't fall a little bit in love with the boy who never grows up? The one that can fly simply by thinking happy thoughts? I know I did.
But this, oh wow. This was absolutely fantastic! I love the ballet to begin with. Have since I was a child and saw The Nutcracker for the first time. In the past year I've seen Romeo & Juliet, The Nutcracker, and now Peter Pan, all done by the Cincinnati Ballet Company. I must give them credit, their creative department and their choreographers and geniuses. Anyone that gets the chance should definitely take the opportunity to go see it. Unfortunately you won't be able to see it in Cincinnati again, at least not for awhile since today's show was the finale show. It's sad really, because I'd go see it again and again if given the opportunity.
The costumes were amazing, the choreography inspired, and the music was phenomenal. It turns out that the score for this production was written by Carmon DeLeone, who happens to be the maestro for the orchestra that plays for the ballet. Yes, Cincinnati Ballet Company dances with a live orchestra in the pit. Apparently that's not always the case these days... I guess we're spoiled here because I've never seen the ballet in any other way.
What impressed me the most, or worried me before I saw it, was flying. How in the world was a ballet company going to go about making the ballerinas and danseurs fly? Well, I'm not sure how they did it, but it was awesome. Peter Pan, Wendy, Michael, and John did in fact fly. It almost made me want to go and beg the stage hands to give me a chance to fly across the stage.
But the best part for me, or the most amusing, was the Crocodile, played by Jason Wang. It was hilarious. Hands down one of the funniest performances I've ever seen. I'm not sure if it was the choreography, or Jason hamming it up, but the kid put on one heck of a show. You probably won't believe me, but the Crocodile actually did the moonwalk across the stage. If that wasn't enough to endear his performance, later on in the show he tangos with Captain Hook. I applaud Jason for his talent and performance, because it was truly fantastic. As well as everyone else, but I have to be honest and say the Croc definitely made the show for me.
My daughters loved it, which made me ecstatic. I love that I can finally share my love of the ballet with someone else. And I can introduce them to culture at a young age. For all it's faults, Cincinnati is a wonderful place to introduce children to culture. I think the next step will be taking them to see The Cincinnati Pops directed by Erich Kunzel. That will be a treat the whole family should enjoy.
Until then, think happy thoughts and fly. And always, always remember that living would be an awfully big adventure.
I am so utterly ashamed of myself. When I initially started this, I had that go get 'em attitude... unfortunately, like so many other things that I plan out, life got in the way. Anyway, I am going to use this opportunity to just do a random mind dump. Mostly because I want to let y'all know some of the craziest things that have happened to me in the past few weeks.
So anyway, you know how most people have that filter in their minds? The one that says, "Hey, wait! Don't say that out loud. Trust me, it sounds much better in here..." Well, I think mine broke, if it ever existed to begin with. Case in point:
Last week, while sitting in the lounge at Kiki's dance class I was talking with some of the other parents there. Don't ask me why, but we always somehow manage to talk about the most random and crazy things in the world. Last week I may have mentioned that I am somewhat of a freak and a weirdo magnet. I don't care where I am or what I am doing, but freaks and weirdos flock to me like there ain't no tomorrow. I was telling them about an experience I had at a Bengals game. It was two weeks before I gave birth to my son, so needless to say, I was VERY much pregnant. The belly was... well, there really are no words to describe it. It has to be seen to be believed. (Pictures can be seen at www.kiramcdonald.com and then click on the Keegan Album and from there you can see 'the belly')
So back to my rambling... I was telling them about this woman who approached and asked if she could touch my belly. I'm not one of those people that's freakishly protective over my pregnant stomach. Maybe because I was a waitress when I was pregnant with my first child, and you'd be surprised at how many people touch without asking... So I told the woman yes, thinking she would touch it and be done, right? Wrong. Oh how very wrong I was. Her husband came looking for her after about 10 minutes. So here I'm thinking, "Free at last!" Right? Wrong again. Can you believe her husband joined in on the belly-rubbing? Freaky, right? That's what I was thinking too.
So after about 15 MORE minutes of the weirdos who were touching my belly, I was finally able to escape, claiming I desperately needed to pee. Wasn't entirely a lie, but I really was a little rattled. And my husband? Yeah, the jerk was standing off about 10 feet away laughing at me. I haven't forgotten that. He'll be reminded of it someday. Anyway, that brought on a conversation about how some people think it's cool to touch your baby... totally not cool. Especially if they don't ask or even know you. But anyway, one of the women was telling us about a girl she goes to church with. Now, the dance mom (who will now be referred to as DM) was getting sick, so when the church mom (who will be referred to as CM to avoid confusion) asked her to hold her three week old baby, DM balked. First of all, she doesn't really know CM all that well, plus she didn't want to get CM's baby sick. So CM gave her a dirty look, and DM told her she was sick and din't want the baby getting sick, but CM was insistent that DM hold her baby so she could go to the restroom.
Here's the part where my filter, or lack thereof comes into play. I'm cracking up at this whole situation, because it sounds like something that might happen to me when I said something absolutely crazy. I said, "What? Did she want you to lick the baby?" Then I went lick, lick, lick in thin air and said, "There. Now the baby's sick too." Are you shocked? Maybe even slightly appalled? I was. It really didn't sound like that in my head. They all got a kick out of it... but I still can't believe my brain didn't shutdown my mouth's function. But oh no, it doesn't stop there. As if that wasn't bad enough...
This week at dance class again (I'm really starting to think I should just put my iPod on shuffle, sit in the corner, and keep to myself) we were talking about the ballet. My cousin dances for the Cincinnati Ballet and we were talking about her only being a junior in high school. So one of the dads was asking about the Cincinnati School of Creative and Performing Arts. Only he couldn't remember the name of it. So I told him and said it's also known as the SCPA. Another one of the dance moms said that when she was younger she always got that confused with the SPCA (which for those of you who don't know is the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.) Ready for the filterless comment? I said, "It's okay, your kids will receive the finest education in the creative and performing arts. Don't worry, they won't be spayed or neutered."
Yeah. One week I'm talking about licking babies and the next week I'm talking about spaying and neutering young kids. I think I finally figured out why the freaks flock to me. So much for small mercies...
So this week at church we started a new series called "The Outward Focused Life." It's all about serving others in a me-first world. Every day our pastor, Dave Workman, is going to send an outward focused thought of the day. So, what I am going to do is read the thought, then share my feelings about it with all of you.
This week's focus is on grace. So first, let's focus on the definition of grace. As a noun. Here is the entry from http://dictionary.reference.com on grace:
grace: noun -I only included those that have to do with our outward focused thought of the day. There were many more, but for simplicity, these will work.
1. elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action.
2. a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment.
3. favor or good will.
4. a manifestation of favor, esp. by a superior: It was only through the dean's grace that I wasn't expelled from school.
5. mercy; clemency; pardon: an act of grace.
6. favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity.
7. Theology.
a. the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God.
b. the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them.
c. a virtue or excellence of divine origin: the Christian graces.
d. Also called state of grace. the condition of being in God's favor or one of the elect.
8. moral strength: the grace to perform a duty.
9. a short prayer before or after a meal, in which a blessing is asked and thanks are given.
So in layman's terms, grace can be defined by more than just simple kindness. It's goodwill. It's more than just simply saying something kind to someone... it's a state of life. Too many people today think of themselves first and/or only without any thought to the people they deal with everyday. For example, here is a portion of Dave's TODT:
Some time back I was in a fast-food restaurant that was freezing. I said to a woman at the cash register, "Hey, it's pretty cold in here." She smiled and said, "Yeah, that's how we like it back here. It gets warm in the kitchen." I said, "Yeah, but your customers are eating with their coats on." She looked at me like I was from another planet and said, "I know. But this is how we like it back here." I knew this wasn't going anywhere. I ate my cheeseburger with my coat on.
This is a situation that's mirrored all over the world every day. What scares me is that this is something that happened at a place where the employees are PAID to serve you. If you can't even get served when you SHOULD get served, how as a world can we come to a point where we voluntarily serve others without any kind of monetary compensation? What kind of world are our children going to inherit from us?
As a parent, the hardest job I face is teaching my children to think of others. There is so much focus placed on self in society that it's a battle of my will vs. today's standards. When I was young and working fast food (or any other job where I served customers) I tried to remember that without the customer, I wouldn't have a job. Perhaps that was a little too simplistic for the purposes of grace, but at least it changed my demeanor toward the customer. I am trying to make myself a better person and therefore make my children better people than I was. Part of that is learning from my experiences and mistakes and trying to teach my children based on those. Obviously, most people also need to learn, touch, feel, and experience for themselves, but we can try to lead by example.
So today I have a challenge for you. Today, I want you to be graceful. When your spouse comes home from a long, hard day at work and they start venting and complaining, instead of shutting them out, listen to what they have to say and try to help. When you see that person searching for change to buy a drink, reach into your pocket and offer the change you have. If they want an explanation of why, simply smile and say "Because I thought you needed it." And if you're so inclined, you can add, "And because God loves you." You'll be surprised at the reactions you'll receive.
